The One Before You

Watch how they treat the person before. The one they dated and talked to before you.  

When I was a sophomore, there was this guy that who had a girlfriend, but he always flirted with me . When he broke up with one girlfriend , he would flirt with me and be aggressive, but then  he would end up in another relationship. He told me that the girls pursued him, but that he always wanted to be with me. So one day, he broke up with his girlfriend , and I thought this was the greatest sacrifice, that he was honest, that he really did want to be with me, and he finally cut the other girls off. When he asked me out, on Saturday night, I waited until I saw him on Monday, to finally show that I had a boyfriend. That Monday, I was walking off the campus and I saw him with another girl, trying to give her a hickey, as he was dry humping her. His friends tapped him and said, “Ayee Jay’s coming! Bro she coming” As I passed him, I heard him say , “I don’t care, I had to.”  I got on the bus and I cried. He had no shame. He had no regret.

The next at school I cussed him out in front of all of our friends and then cried in the bathroom afterwards. The whole school was talking about how I embarrassed  him and the mean words I said. He then text me and said, “Why couldn’t you just come talk to me one on one, instead infront of everyone.” I did not reply. He was concerned about his image instead of the disloyalty I received.  He cheated on all of his girlfriends with me, and then left before our relationship got to start. I thought I was the exception to the rule but I learned a valuable lesson. How they treat the person before is often a clear indication of how they will treat you.

If they cheated on them, they will cheat on you. If they lied to them, they will lie to you.  What you’re looking for is not only their character, but their nature. Ask yourself these questions before considering a relationship or talking to someone:

What is their nature?

What patterns have they shown you to make you confident that they have good intentions towards you?

How can you prevent yourself from getting trapped in their web of lies or deceit?

Keep this in mind as you make yourself available, look, and pursue others.